Friday, December 26, 2008

Happy Festivus!

Every year, come December, my summer glow long faded, my pallid yellow complexion tends to blend with the winter/holiday blues and my skin starts to look greenish. Not Forest Green, not Envy Green, but more of a....a Grinchy Green. Could it be that year round The Grinch is just The Asian? It's something to consider.

This year was no different. With my year end lime grinchy coloration I packed my bags and headed on the NJ Transit back to my hometown for the holidays. While on the train, I reached down in my bag for my book and got stabbed in the eye with someone's roll of wrapping paper. They were on to me. Down with the Grinch! Give her eyeballs wrapping paper cuts! Nevertheless I made it home and immediately locked myself in my room, put up a miserable Facebook status, and took a nap, hoping I would wake up and find out I've slept through January 2nd. Instead I woke to my blackberry buzzing: J sent you a facebook message. Its subject header was "SOS" and its body read along the lines of, "Being home sucks. Scoured facebook to see who else was home and also seemingly as miserable as me. Found you. Come out and play." J., The one person I who wouldn't mind misery as his company and wouldn't attempt to get me back in the holiday spirits. We could jinx each other everytime we said Bah Humbug in unison!

Text reply: Ok hold on. Let me see if I can borrow my mom's minivan.
J: Tell her there will be parents there and I'll have you home by 11.

Proceeded to get quite drunk and things seemed to look brighter. Was my skin sunshiney yellow again?

Got home not too late. Tried to act sober in front of mom. Noticed HUGE Hickory Farms gift basket out of the corner of my eye. My mom told me it was a Christmas gift to her from my brother. Oh how nice I replied. I eyed the foot long stick of smoked beef, drunk and hungry. My mom said she doesn't eat beef and said it was all too much for her and that I could bring some home with me. Eyes starting to cross, saliva escaping the side of my mouth, I no longer could mask my drunkeness. I looked at the beef longingly. "C-c-can I? Have some now?" My mom being the generous mother that she is says of course, help yourself, and left me alone with the basket, I'm certain, no longer able to look at the sad sight of a daughter she had raised. Too lazy to go to kitchen and grab proper utensils and a plate. Searched mom's room for scissors for the plastic wrap over the meat. Found boxcutter. Momentarily thought to self: Should not be operating boxcutter in this state. Total fleeting moment. Sent brother text: Thanks for the Hickory Farms butthead! Great drunk food! Love you!!

Perhaps Grinches just need to be fed. A stick of beef and some cheese washed down by vodka does the trick!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Merry Christmas Eve!

I asked for a $1000 dollar gift card from Barnes and Nobles and all I got was a measly $100 from my brother. Bah Humbug!

My palm Christmas tree with The Grinch ornament. Very fitting.

(Just kidding, Rich! I love you!)

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Congratulations Carr!

Congrats on your engagement, Caroline and Justin! So excited for you two! And of course, we're looking forward to another bachelorette party! Ibiza '09!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

I have great friends

I was having a rough day over the weekend and my good friend, Tim, brought me flowers and chicken soup. How sweet is that?

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Christmas Wish List 2008- Cont'd

Gahh!!! I want him!!

Who's a proud Auntie?

My nephew, Logan. The little cutie mcpantster.

December Resolution

I decided on December 1st that I wanted to lose 10 pounds by the end of the month. Ten pounds in 31 days. That's feasible. I figured, why wait till New Years? Here are the reasons why not:

1) My boyfriend is in much better shape than me and that is not OK. He gets up at 5 am to run and workout. Meanwhile I'm usually just getting back from the bars at that hour. I will not be the fatty drunk girlfriend.

2) None of my jeans from last year fit. Quite frankly, they were very expensive jeans and I want to get back into my Skinnys before they go out of style.

3) The sooner I heal from my knee injuries the better. I miss doing activities that involve my knees. Get your minds out of the gutter, I was talking about running, hiking, snowboarding, and kickboxing.

4) I'm considered overweight by my Asian relatives.

5) I will take any excuse to walk around the locker room naked.

So far, I lost 1 pound. And then I gained 4 when I weighed myself at a different gym location. Today I'm back to the 1 pound below starting weight. Does that mean I lost 5 pounds? Either way, I have 21 days left to get to my ideal weight. Before and after pictures to follow!

Monday, December 1, 2008

Christmas Wish List 2008

It's that time of year again! 25 days left to buy me a present! Remember, the following is just here as a guideline:

Christie Martin Necklace $105

Daisy by Marc Jacobs Eau de Toilette $57

Barnes and Noble Gift Card $1,000

Sephora Gift Card $25

A Blender (any brand really)

Pagemark Dictionary With Booklight $39.99

Hair Dryer (any brand)

YOU on a Diet Book $20

Snowboard bindings (small, preferably black) boots (size 7, preferably black) goggles (black or white)

Personal Training Package at New York Sports Club

This is all I have for now. Will add more if anything comes to mind!

On Being Nina

"You're like a non famous, less scary Edgar Allan Poe. You write drunk in a small dark room all by yourself." - Anonymous friend.

On Living Alone

Today, I drank milk straight out of the carton for the first time in years. In the span of five minutes I had consumed and imbibed a glass of wine, a cup of green tea, mixed nuts, 1 Hershey's kiss, and salsa. A completely balanced meal of a girl living on her own.

Not into games

Does anyone understand the concept of the Animal Crossing: City Folk game thingy by Wii speak? I don't get it. So what is it? You call your girlfriend while you're both playing this game and you talk about all the imaginary things you're doing like "shopping" and "watching fireworks"? And this is designed for women? So like when I call my girlfriend that I haven't talked to in weeks or months I would much prefer to skip all the real stuff and talk about my pretend video game life? So confused!