Thai observations

I’ve spent the past 3 months in Thailand and the following is a list of the little things I’ve noticed.

Straws. Buy any sort of beverage and it’ll come with a straw; beer, soda, bottled water, wine, wine coolers, and buckets. Try as you may to deny one but it’ll be in your drink before you can say, “No thanks.”

Unlike in Italy, Ice is taken very seriously in Thailand. At restaurants, waiters will continuously fill your glass to the top with ice. This does not hold same at bars. Bars will charge you extra for ice.

Toilet paper is a luxury. Rarely is toilet paper available at public toilets. If it’s available they usually charge extra for toilet paper. Otherwise, you bring your own.

Toilets are also a luxury. You will still find merely a hole in the ground at most places. If it’s a proper Western toilet, you usually have to pay.

If ants are found in your food you usually send it back to the kitchen. In Thailand, where ants often appear in your food and beverage, you just pick them out.

Microphones and bullhorns. They love it. Everything just sounds better to them when spoken in a mic. Even when it’s just a room filled with 5 people.

Whistles. All doormen, guards, valet, and policemen readily wear one at the tip of their lips. They blow on these whistles all the time, for seemingly no reason. Stop. Go. Faster. Slower. All directions are commanded with the same amount of whistle blows.

Employing people for unnecessary jobs. There’s the guard at the BTS sky train who blows his whistle the moment the train arrives. But the train has already arrived so why alert us with the whistle? The guard who salutes and opens the door for you at the mall. Again, unnecessary. The extra 10 guys working around 7-eleven who only seemed to dust candy bars and cigarettes.

All things VIP. There never seems to be any identifiable difference between what’s labeled VIP and what’s not but Thai people always willingly pay more for something that’s labeled VIP.

Wrapping things in plastic bags and rubber bands. You can find any sauce or beverage wrapped in a tiny plastic bag filled with air and wrapped a hundred times around with a rubber band.

Fire games. Light any childhood game on fire and it becomes the fun bar game that replaces darts and pool. Jumprope? Light it on fire! Limbo? Light the stick on fire! Twister? Left foot fire circle!

Rules are merely suggestions in Thailand. Signs are sometimes posted in situations where you can hurt yourself. No one would stop you. They just suggest you didn’t.

I’ve been a bit depressed about having to leave Thailand and get back to reality. I’ve always loved New York City and have never seen myself leaving. But right now I can’t imagine returning. As I pack my bags I think about the following things that I have missed about NYC:

Brunch. Bloody mary’s, mimosas, and eggs nova at Elmo. Mmmm.
A proper dirty martini.
Not sweating through my clothes the moment I walk out the door.
Not having to wear mozzie spray every time I’m out.
My black leggings and leather jacket.
People who don’t stroll.
(Of course my lovely friends, but that’s a given).

Ok, I guess this list wouldn’t be found printed on the back of an I LOVE NY t-shirt. Maybe I’ll be more convincing once I return.