Wednesday, April 8, 2009

When one door closes...


It's been one week now since I've joined the other 8.5% of this country who is unemployed. A month ago I used my "safety money" to pay for the security deposit for my barely affordable apartment. Six days ago I bought a shitload of furniture to make my apartment more comfortable. The day after that, after I assembled all the furniture, I got let go from my job.

I was initially in shock, feeling like someone took a giant tennis racket and knocked me on my ass. Then I became angry. And then the tears just flowed. For 2 straight days. I felt like I had been dumped. I just wanted to hide under my covers and cry. I knew this was not productive or proactive behavior.

After tons of phone calls, lots of crying, and an infinite amount of love and support from my friends and family, I'm feeling good again. What goes down must come up, right? My friends comforted me with their words as C told me, "It's not like you got fired from your book." More than a handful of my friends began making calls for me and offered to help in any way, whether it was a loan or a couch to sleep on. My big brother reminded me that I always bounce back and that he would support me in whatever I do. Le sigh. The tears might return. I feel all fuzzy inside.

I took a walk around Barnes and Noble. This always calms me down. I hit the bottle. This always leaves me feeling temporarily invincible.

Losing my job was incredibly bad timing (I guess there's never really a good time), but I had to reflect and question why this happened. I was working my butt off to pay for my apartment. I wasn't able to put as much time into freelancing or my book. I realized this kick in the butt was telling me that I was going in the wrong direction.

A plan has been formed. I've got the bounce back in my step. Stay tuned... will share details as soon as the plans are set in motion.

Wish me luck!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Weird. Sometime last week when I was reading your blog, it dawned on me that I didn't know what you actually did for a living. Meant to ask you, but it slipped my mind. Thank god I didn't! That would have been really bad timing!

You would have been like, "WAAAHHHH! Fuck you!!!!". lol

But yes, I think you'll be surprised by the opportunities that present themselves that would have never happened had you been tied down at your last job.

Life is like a book. If it's gonna be a good book, you gotta keep the story moving forward, right?

-Britt J

JD said...

I voluntarily quit a job I loved to move 3,000 miles away to follow the love of my life as he pursues the career he's always wanted. Sounds romantic - but I still cry about it as I suffer to find something to do now and am having some sort of identity crisis. Know that (although circumstances are slightly different) - I feel your pain. And... more importantly - look forward to toasting the successes you'll have as your move forward :)