much needed weekend

I'm so excited for this weekend. I'm going to the Jersey Shore to spend some much needed time with my girlfriends. I need to get out of town and I need a good hug (and lots of martinis).

Hope you guys enjoy the holiday weekend!

you are...

Rejection tends to leave your ego a bit bruised. I've been feeling a bit low since The Boy and I can't seem to get myself out of it. My friends have been wonderful, telling me I deserve better, but it's just words lost on deaf ears if I don't believe it myself. I saw this poster online and thought, this is how I should be feeling everyday.

Officially birthdayed out!

So May is the much mentioned "Birthday Month" but last week was "Birthday Week" in serious effect. I went to dinner at The Mark on Tuesday. Wednesday, I met up with Miss Brit for a sushi dinner on St. Mark's. I've missed her so much and we got all caught up over sushi and sake. We then went to meet her friends at a pub where Brit didn't even remember she had her 22nd birthday. The bar was a dingy little pub where I asked Brit if she noticed that everyone in there was extremely unattractive. I am always skeptical of a bar full of uglies, I joked. It turned out to be a hilariously random night (most nights with her are) that ended with us pigging out on artichoke pizza. My stomach felt like it had a bowling ball in it the following morning.

Thursday, another great friend of mine took me out to dinner at Campaniolas in the Upper East. My friend Tanya, who was my best friend in kindergarten, also came. Dinner was absolutely fantastic. We had antipasto, steak, shrimp, and of course lots of wine and champagne. At the end of dinner the waiter brought out a huge plate filled with various cakes and desserts with a candle in the middle. I was absolutely touched, I really couldn't have asked for more, as the entire staff and restaurant sang Happy Birthday to me. I was smiling from ear to ear feeling like the most special girl in the world. That is, until I went to the bathroom shortly after and realized I had a HUGE basil leaf covering an entire tooth. An entire tooth!!! I was absolutely mortified! All those people staring and smiling at me. I thought they were thinking how fabulous I am. They were probably just laughing at my huge blackened tooth! I could've let it ruin my night (did I mention how mortified I was?) but I figured they must know that I just ate a delicious feast and that I don't always have a huge basil leaf stuck on my tooth. We drank lots and lots more after dinner and a nice gentleman got me a cab and paid my fare to make sure I got home safely. I must say not enough men my age do this and that's a shame. It really makes a girl feel like a lady. I felt so absolutely wonderful that night. I remember thinking during dinner that this is just what I needed. I was surrounded by people who cared about me and wanted to do something special for me, unlike The Boy who (at the end) kept reminding me of the things he couldn't give me. I thought, screw him! I deserve more!

My mood quickly changed Friday afternoon. Perhaps it was the post binge depression mixed with being left alone to my thoughts but I couldn't stop thinking about The Boy. I moped around on the couch the entire day wondering why I'm so unlovable. Then Little One made my night by calling me to say she was going to take me to dinner and drinks. I just didn't want to be alone, moping over a Boy who didn't appreciate me.

Saturday was my actual birthday (it's hard to keep track with how many celebrations I had). I again woke up feeling incredibly sad. I took "It's my party and I'll cry if I want to" to another level. My mom called and I just wanted to burst into tears because I missed her so much. I was touched by all of the phone calls and messages but I just couldn't pull myself of out my birthday blues. I'm not sure what it was. I get it every year. Anyway, I bought a pretty off-whitish dress and cute heels to help cheer me up for the night. I went for an amazing tapas dinner with some of my girlfriends and then a night of dancing until we literally all fell in a heap from exhaustion. My friends are more than I could ever ask for.

(dessert was french toast with cream cheese filling- YUMMMMS!)





The birthday did not end there. I woke up the following morning and my legs were seriously throbbing from dancing in heels all night. I was throwing a birthday BBQ at 3PM and had not done one thing to prepare. Didn't bake the cupcakes, purchase food and alcohol, or clean. I was so tired I wanted to call everyone and tell them it's been cancelled. But Bionic Woman came over and lent a hand and the BBQ was a lovely low key shindig. It was slightly chilly at times but I was so happy it didn't rain like I had feared (and cried all week over).



I can honestly say I am extremely birthdayed out! I had such a good time and am touched by all of my friends and now I need to name June "Birthday Recovery Month."

I also want to thank everyone for making me feel so special, for taking me out, and for all of the cards and gifts. Bionic Woman got me an awesome shirt and a touching card, Little One made some yummy banana cupcakes with peanut butter frosting, and Elfin brought me Hello Kitty balloons (I'm such a child). My brother, the most thoughtful gift giver ever sent me this beautiful red leather journal with my initials monogrammed on it along with a lovely card that brought tears to my eyes.





THANK YOU!!!!!

Eat, Pray, Love

I was watching Oprah today (I'm unemployed, I watch a LOT of Oprah) and Julia Roberts was on the show talking about Eat, Pray, Love, the movie, that's coming out in August. I'm so excited to see this movie. I remember when I read the book I was in a toxic relationship quite similar to the one the author, Liz Gilbert, was in with David. I remember crying and crying after I reading that she finally walked away from that relationship because I knew I had to do the same with mine. This book really hit a spot with me because it speaks to everyone who's ever been through a heart break, given up on love, or forgotten who they were.

So on the show, Oprah asks each of the cast members where is their Eat, Pray, and Love place. James Franco who plays David answered California for all 3 because his favorite sandwich shop is there, his family who are his prayers, and his girlfriend. While watching the show I wondered what was my Eat, Pray, Love?

I thought definitely my favorite food in the world is Thai Food and there's nothing better than street food in Bangkok. There's too many dishes to pick from but a childhood favorite that I can rarely find in the states is Kao Mun Gai, chicken rice. And I have some strange addiction to eggs in every form. The other day I have half a dozen (in one day!). Gotta get my cholesterol checked for sure.



I do almost all of my praying when I am in Thailand as well. I don't know many temples here in NYC and I feel out of touch with the religion because I don't really know many other Buddhists. Because the country is majority Buddhist I feel much more in touch with my religion and have much more access to temples when I am in Thailand.



For some reason, I tend to fall in "love" every time I am back in Thailand. Perhaps it's the romantic beaches, or the gorgeous foreign men, or the fact that I let my guard down when I'm on holiday but I always leave there with fond memories of a tan, shirtless man sipping mango shakes with me on the beach. Mmm. Also, when I eventually meet someone, Thailand is where I'd like to get married.



So, like James Franco, my Eat, Pray, Love can all be found in the same place. Perhaps I should be booking a ticket back?

What and where is your Eat, Pray, Love?

It's my birthday!

It's my birthday today! I've been so busy I haven't had time to blog. Running out to a tapas dinner and drinks with my girlfriends. Will post updates after the weekend! xoxoxo

riding lessons

I went to dinner with a friend to The Mark, a Jean Georges restaurant in the Mark Hotel, tonight. It was a pre-birthday slash catching up dinner. The food was amazing (I had Branzino with couscous, he had the famous burger), our waitress, Ms Velasguez (didn't catch her first name), was super sweet, and tonight was the first time I smiled in 3 days. My friend spent half the evening trying to knock some sense into me, yelling at me for not realizing I deserve better men. (The beginning half of the night was wasted on me telling him about The Boy). I've been told by my guy friends, girl friends, and husbands of my girlfriends that I deserve the world. So why is it that I haven't met one person that's offering said world to me? Hmmm? Regardless, whenever I talk to him I do feel better and I do slightly start to believe that settling is not an option.

I got home tonight, buzzed from the yummy Lychee Raspberry Bellinis, and I received a lovely email from my facebook husband on the other side of the world, also telling me to buck up and find a new (more deserving) horse to ride.

(My friend chose the restaurant because of the last line in the first paragraph of this snarky New York Times review. He said the sarcasm reminded him of me.)

Cupid Lies

A dear friend of mine started a website called Cupid Lies where readers can write in about their dating gripes or commiserate with other people's dating issues. He was sweet enough to include a post I wrote on how to get over a break up on his site. I've doled out a lot of dating advice on various blogs but I think it's time I start listening to my own advice.

And yes. Cupid Lies.



Tim and I at Cupid Lies launch party.

down in the dumps

The Boy and I are not seeing each other anymore. Actually it was his decision. I received the news via email last night. Email.

I knew it was coming but I had hoped that it wouldn't. I had been frustrated with his lack of effort and he felt I wanted too much. I knew from the beginning he wasn't ready for something serious but neither was I. What does serious even mean? I was enjoying the time we spent together but I felt I was missing all the fun parts of dating, the part that comes with being pursued. I got to the point where I wondered, what is wrong with me? Why am I with a guy who says, "I like you but I can't give you anything." Why was I so accepting of that? Don't I deserve someone who thinks, "Wow, I've got a great girl. I'm gonna do what I can to make her happy."

I believe I do. So why am I feeling so sad?

tomatoes and potatoes

Friday night got off to a frustrating start. I couldn't get into the city until 1 AM because the trains weren't running. Then I couldn't get a taxi because everyone who was waiting for a train was also trying to hail a cab. Then the traffic was just horrible.

Everything was better once I saw Miss Brit and Heinley. (and did a bunch of shots). I needed a night of dancing and laughing with good friends.

Happy Birthday, love!

It's my bff Care Bear's birthday today! (I love my tauruses!) She's the most wonderful friend ever and I wish I was with her to celebrate.

Love you!!!

tell me

Boys boys boys. They're making me so frustrated right now! I'm a little tired of the last minute "hey you wanna grab a drink" texts. How about a real date? (although the one with Flight Boy didn't go so well) How about calling ahead of time to make plans? I'm quite disappointed.

Flight Boy

I recently went on a date with Flight Boy. I've made this mistake many times before but I have yet to learn. I wasn't overly excited about him when I met him but I thought, "He seems nice, why don't I go on a date to see if there are any sparks?" From past experience these sparkless guys that "seem nice" that I date to "see how it goes"  have never worked out. Yet I tried again.

He invited me to a Mets game and while I am a Yankee fan I love baseball games in general so I agreed to go. I was a little hesitant though. On the one hand a baseball game is a fun date where there wouldn't be too much pressure for face to face conversation. On the other hand these games could go on for hours and I would be stuck if I wasn't having a good time.

I had been drinking for 4 days straight prior to the date, had very little sleep, and was running late because I took a train in from Jersey. I didn't even have time to shower or change my clothes. He did everything right that day. He was very understanding of my "state," made good conversation, and was a complete gentleman. And by gentleman I mean he kept he filled with hot dogs and beer. I thought it was a great date and he seemed like a great guy but I just didn't feel any sparks. He just wasn't for me.

The following day he texted to ask me if I was free this week for drinks. I didn't want to waste either of our time stringing him along and debated what I could text back to turn him down "nicely." But I had forgotten about the text and forgot to reply. About 2 hours later he sent me another text that read, "A simple 'no' would have been suffice." UM. This made me livid. It was very hostile and rude. And where does he get off? How does he know I wasn't busy, in class, at work, on a train, or just any place where I couldn't text? This was a major dealbreaker for me so I definitely will not be seeing Flight Boy again.

Frankly, I'm surprised he's interested considering the poor showing I made at the date. Isn't it funny how there are dates where we take hours getting dressed and looking our best and we never hear back from the guy? And when we put in no effort (like negative effort) they're interested.

lol cat

Gus has developed a new super power.

persistence is critical

"The truth of the matter is that the people who succeed in the arts most often are the people who get up again after getting knocked down. Persistence is critical."   -Novelist Scott Turow who's written 4 unpublished novels before he published Presumed Innocent.

hot shorts

These hot shorts that Vanessa Paradis is wearing were all over the May issue of Marie Claire. My friends claim they look like underwear but when it comes to shorts, for me, the smaller the better! What do you guys think?

(I don't care- I'm running out to get a pair!)

taurus love

Happy Birthday to my British Twin! Hugs and kisses from NYC.

(I'm sure by now she's passed out in some alley way in London). ;)

so many birthdays!

I am still trying to recover from my fun filled weekend. Friday was another beautiful day so I had my girlfriends come over and sunbathe on my rooftop. Later that evening I had my friend, Whitney's, surprise birthday party at 675 bar in the Meatpacking district. She had fried cheesecake for dessert. (It was amazing).





I was trying to drink water between each drink and leave by midnight because I had to be up early the next day. This did not happen.

I woke up the next morning with very little sleep and was dragging through my day. At 6 PM I took the path train to Hoboken to catch a ride to the shore for my best friend, Care Bear's, birthday celebration. (I have a lot of Taurus friends). I was only in Hoboken for 15 minutes and was so glad I don't live there anymore.

We went to our favorite martini bar and had quite a lot of laughs (and martinis!) over the night. I was quite drunk so, sadly, I didn't take many pictures. After the bar closed, naturally, we went for late night snacks. I got the cheesesteak sliders. Delicious!



Typical Kate got ketchup all over her boots. haha.



And typical Nina drunk face.



Sunday morning I had to wake up way early to catch a train back to NYC to make it in time for a Mets game. I was slightly bitter about this since I wanted to enjoy the afternoon with my girlfriends. I was tired, hungover, hadn't showered, and didn't have time to change my clothes. And it was a super chilly, windy afternoon. But aside from that it was a really exciting game. I haven't seen the Mets play (I'm a Yankee fan) since the subway series in 2000 and this was my first time in the new Citi Field stadium.



I went with a guy I met on my flight to LA...but I'm not gonna dish on that just yet.



I'm so glad to have the day off from drinking today. Time to get back to being a productive citizen (and back on my diet)...

happy mothers day!

I'm sad that I won't be spending this Mother's Day with my mom. She is the strongest woman I know and I don't tell her enough just how much I love and appreciate her.

happy cinco de mayo!

This picture was taken two years ago in Tiajuana. I do not recommend going there.



But I did get this cute dress out of the trip.




And this top that I'm wearing today. I'm so festive.

unicorns, dinosaurs, and robots, Oh my!

I've had birthday on my mind lately since it's birthday month(!). There's so much I want do but my friends have such different schedules. Oh and there's that teeny tiny little thing - I'm broke. I was having a downer day last week and was going to punish myself and not celebrate my birthday because I felt I didn't deserve it. But, you know, it only comes around once a year and maybe I was being just a little harsh on myself.

I've been feeling my age lately and, combined with being broke, I thought a BBQ on my roof top would be a great, affordable birthday party. I decided to have a Unicorns, Dinosaurs, and Other Mythical Creatures BBQ, a little throw back kiddie party (with alcohol of course!) so that I can reminisce about the days when my biggest concern was hoping no one would find me first during Hide & Seek. I came up with the theme from a hilarious party I attended that involved unicorns and robots, and the dinosaurs part is a running joke with my girlfriends, and I decided to throw in other creatures just to leave the possibilities endless.

I was cleaning my room the other day and I came across some old birthday party photos. They made me a little sad because those times were just so happy. Is that weird? My mom is the most incredible woman ever and she used to throw me the best birthday parties with the best cakes. She would also surprise me at school with pizzas, soda, and cake for my entire class. (That's how I made my friends).



And look! I found a birthday where I had a unicorn cake! Full circle, baby.



This photo makes me laugh. I was such a little brat. My mom got me the dress and the leotard and I was mad that this girl in my class put it on because she was so much bigger than me and I thought she'd rip my leotard. Hey, it's my party and I'll cry if I want to!

summer accessories

I'm still broke and not allowed to go shopping but I can make a mental shopping list for later, right? Since I can't afford too many new items this summer maybe I could buy just a few accessories to add to the clothes I already have. I'm loving this Boater's Hat:



And Ray Ban Wayfarers. I know everyone has them but I still think they're cool.



These nude pumps would match everything and make legs look tanner and longer. Always helpful.

perfect sunny weekend

My first weekend in May was a great start to the month. I spent Friday afternoon reading on my roofdeck and met Bionic Woman for a Greg Holden show in LES later that night. BW has been on a quest to broaden my limited music knowledge. I'm definitely a new fan of Greg Holden. I was sold once I saw his hair and heard his British accent. done. 



I met Little One for an early evening drink on Saturday but early got very late after a few rounds of drinks.

Sunday was very warm (and I was a bit hungover) but I didn't want to waste a beautiful day indoors so I sat out on my roof deck again with a book (The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath) and a spray bottle of water to keep me cool. The snow, rain, and wind of the winter has made our roof look like a dump site of trash and debris so I spent an hour sweeping, cleaning, and setting up the deck furniture. I must have looked like a desperate housewife doing yard work in a bikini and sun hat.

After I was done on the roof I decided to take a bike ride through Queens down by Astoria park and along the water. It was so relaxing. I stopped at the Hell's Gate bridge to take a photo. I love this view for some reason. The pictures do not do justice to the blue skies and the view.



I rewarded my hard work with a bottle of champagne and a cheese plate with Elfin at The Clerkenwell in LES. (The French waitress is so sweet there). Tim and Little One met up with us and we had two more bottles of wine and tapas at Macondo. The decor of this place is so cute and ceviche might be my new favorite food. (Their salmon ceviche was to die for!)



At one point I looked up from our yummy plates and saw that we were all updating our facebook statuses at the same time. We're so cool!



The bathroom at Macondo is painted with chalkboard paint so I left our mark.



I heart sunny weekends with beautiful friends!