F you, Mother Nature!

Whenever I start spewing nonsense such as, "Life's so great," expect imminent doom to follow in the form of a monsoon, apocalypse, or a broken sandal with no shoe store in sight. I prayed all Monday morning for rain so that I wouldn't have to go to work. Prayed and prayed and prayed. Danced around my apartment in my underwear banging the thunder pot on my head. I got all excited when I swore I heard thunder, only to realize it was Andrew moving a heavy chair. I thought I heard a downpour only to find out it was our neighbors vacuuming upstairs. I reluctantly got dressed and started walking to the train. Three blocks into my walk, 7 blocks away from the train, it started pouring elephants. It was the type of rain that even though you have an umbrella you are soaked from neck down the only things dry are your hair and the inside of your umbrella. I got on the train and my legs start getting red bumps on them- the only culprit could be the nasty street water I was sloshing around in. I emerged from the train 15 minutes later and it was blue skies as far as the eye can see. Two fingers up to the sky. Three hours and $5 later the sky turned black, tree branches fell, and the rain came down again. It's a spectacular day when you've been caught in a downpour, got a nasty rash from it, dried up, and got soaked again, and got a mosquito bite on my face. I've discovered another person who hates me- Mother Nature.