5 AM Wake up to mom huddled in the bed shining a flashlight around the room. She was looking for snakes since they like to hide in the cool, dry, and dark corners when it rains.
7 AM Just woke up. Slept in today.
10 AM Mom won’t stop feeding me. I can’t turn it down. Kao Gee (grilled sticky rice cooked in egg), guava, magoes, coconut, soft corn.
11 AM GAHHHHHHHHH!!!!! I’ve finished my last *book. I have 5 days left here! What am I to do? Freaking out! How does my grandma do it? She lives so simply. Doesn’t see any need for excesses. She barely says a word but when she does she shouts, hardly able to hear herself. I admire her strength and even more her calm.
* The book I just finished, Second Chances by Jane Green, was really great. It was pretty predictable but still an easy, fun read. It’s a story about friends reunited after a friend’s death and how your life really can change in a split second that really forces you to take a closer look at your life and reevaluate the choices that you’ve made.
Mom has switched the oldies karaoke soundtrack for Isan music (Thai “country music”). This music used to hurt my ears but today I’m quite enjoying it. It fits the setting much better.
11:30 AM These $7 Post It 3 in 1 pen (highlighter, pen, and post its) that I bought from Borders before I left sucks! The pen barely works. Garbage!
1 PM Am realizing that by 1 PM everyday I’m at wit’s end with mom. I do this when I spend too much time with people. I start to notice their habits, mannerisms, and phrases they say often, and then I get annoyed when I can predict what they’re going to do or say next. My close friends hate this about me.
3 PM After going to the market, sweating to death, the car wouldn’t start. Trapped in a hot car with mom. Remind me what I’ve done to piss off God so much.
5 PM Call bank. Realize my last check bounced. Am very pissed off and irritated. Super stressed about money.
Get in huge fight with mom because she’s crazy. She asks me to do something, I do it, and then she tells me she wanted something else done instead. Counting the days till I can be on the beach. Mom apologizes for being crazy.
6 PM Discovered another insect specie that’s out to get me. Five tiny little bugs that look like ants with wings fly into my shirt without me knowing it. I am only aware of their presence once my stomach starts burning and is covered in tiny little red bumps. How do people live here???
7 PM Ate dinner. It rained all day again so the air was much cooler. Fell asleep in the chair on the deck, wrapped up in blankets. Very peaceful.
11 PM Asked mom, who was holding a flashlight, if she minded taking a look to see if there are any holes in the moong because some bugs got in. She takes this as me complaining and starts yelling at me. Get in a huge row. I’ll admit I can be difficult at times but I definitely wasn’t in the wrong this time. Wonder if there will come a time when we get along.
Have some bad dreams. Can’t remember what about. So stressed. Hoping tomorrow is a better day.
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